Damn, this woman just amazes me. As I spend my days worrying about whether or not I'll have time to eat before class (usually no), if I should change my major (which I've pretty much decided to do! Yikes!), and if I should buy a new pair of jeans before winter comes full force (yes, but where?!), she WON her battle against cancer! Her spirit just amazes me. I should have been the one encouraging her through her horrific journey and yet her patience, her grace, and her love of life and Jesus has continued to awe me in the months that I have been reading. Seriously, this woman has got a lot of God living inside of her heart. I have never even met her and I want to be more like her!
I take comfort and joy in the fact that God is giving me the struggles that He wants me to have. If He wanted me to fight cancer (I pray not), He would send it at me and give me the tools I need to deal with it. Fortunately for me, I'm thinking about jeans and work and majors and looking forward to the future. I still struggle with depression a lot of the time but I am so grateful that I spend a lot of my time just happy and being. I love just being. It's my absolute favorite state of mind. I love sitting down with a cup of coffee and just thinking about my accounting homework. I love running. I love that I have carved out a time to spend reading the Bible every evening and that the verses and words are sticking with me throughout the day. I love that I have a Bible verse written on my hand right now because I just couldn't leave my room this morning without taking it with me. I'm happy and I'm being. I'm living in the moment but looking forward to the future.
That's it. That's all I've got to say.
I'm going to start blogging more. I got caught in this trap that I should only blog if I have something "inspired" to say and then I realized that that's just dumb because I don't have time to be "inspired" and have deep thoughts. I'm too busy being. So I'm going to write more about how I'm being.
She is clothed in strength and dignity; she laughs at the future to come.
No comments:
Post a Comment